I want to start this week in scripture.

Romans 6:2-5 That is what happened in baptism. When we went under the water, we left the old country of sin behind; when we came up out of the water, we entered into the new country of grace - a new life in a new land! That’s what baptism into the life of Jesus means. When we are lowered into the water, it is like the burial of Jesus; when we are raised up out of the water, it is like the resurrection of Jesus. Each of us is raised into a light-filled world by our Father so that we can see where we’re going in our new grace-sovereign country. MSG

Does that explain your life?   …you left the old country of sin behind; you entered into a new country of grace…

Scripture explains that our new life in Jesus is like moving to a new country.  We leave a life where we are dominated and beaten up by sin and enjoy a new life where sin has no power over us anymore.  In this new country, we are free from the power of sin and loved by God.  That’s the power of God’s grace.  And we must point out that God made it all happen; we had nothing to do with it.  

Scripture explains who we are in our new country of grace.  

2 Corinthians 5:21, 1 Corinthians 6:11b For God took the sinless Christ and poured into him our sins. Then, in exchange, he poured God’s goodness [righteousness] into us! …You were cleansed; you were made holy; you were made right with God by calling on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God. NLT

Allow that to impact you.  God pours His righteousness into you.  God makes you holy and pure.  That’s the power of God’s grace.  That’s who you are.  So not only do you move to a new country of grace, but God also radically purifies you.  As a Christian, we must walk in our new country, our new identity, every day.  We must remind ourselves where we are and who we are every day.  We must stay very close to Jesus through prayer and reading the Bible.  Why?  Because grace leaks.  If we don’t live in it and remind ourselves of it, we will forget all about it.  We will forget about the power of God’s grace.   

Now wrap your mind around this, we might live in the grace country, but we can think and act as if we moved back to our old sin country.  We can forget that sin doesn’t control us anymore.  We can forget that we have been made righteous, holy, and pure.  And when we forget where we are and who we are, we lose courage.  The kind of courage that Peter had when he heard Jesus’ voice, and he jumped out of the boat.  That was courage.  That was passion.  That was strength.  Instead, we lose courage and want to stay in the boat.  When we forget where we are and who we are, what Jesus did for us is stolen.

Let me ask you, how do you wake up every day?  Do you remind yourself about the power of God’s grace in your life?  Do you remind yourself that you have been made righteous, holy, and pure?  Do you walk out the door with unexplainable courage because of what God has done in you?   Now, let’s be honest, have you noticed that when you don’t live in it or remind yourself about it, you forget all about it, and you lose courage?  It happens.  It’s human nature. 

What is happening?  Something spiritual.  God has spiritually freed you.  God has spiritually given you a new life, a new identity, and a new power.  Sam opened our series and explained that you have an enemy who is trying to steal, kill, and destroy everything Jesus has done for you spiritually.  Something spiritual is happening. 

Remember the verse Sam shared last week?   

Ephesians 6:12-13 This is no weekend war that we’ll walk away from and forget about in a couple of hours. This is for keeps, a life-or-death fight to the finish against the Devil and all his angels. Be prepared. You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own. MSG

Last week, Sam said, nothing about our lives really feels all that urgent, does it?  It doesn’t feel like we are in a life-or-death fight to the finish against the devil; it’s just life.  We go to work, pay the bills, and get the kids to the right sports fields.  It all feels so ordinary.  And in living ordinary lives, we struggle to recognize the mind games the enemy is playing in us.  And I want to say, in our loved ones too.  We may not see it, but we are under attack.  

You have an enemy.  He knows he can’t take away God’s grace from you.  He knows he can’t take away God’s righteousness, holiness, and purity from you.  He knows he can’t change the fact that you are a child of God.  So, what does he do?  He comes to lie to you.  And if he can get you to believe a lie, he can steal what Jesus died to give you.  Think about it, why did Adam and Eve bite the apple?   They believed two lies.  They would not die, and they would be like God.   Please hear me, the Christian life is not a playground; it’s a battlefield for your mind.  We call it spiritual warfare.  

Last week, Sam said, our thoughts shape how we view ourselves, how we view other people, how we view life, how we view God.  Our thoughts are so powerful.  What you consistently think will become what you believe, and what you believe will determine how you live and experience life.

One of the lies that Satan will whisper sounds like this, let’s see if you connect with it.  Ready?  

“You don’t deserve God’s grace until you prove to God how sorry you are.  

Look at what you did in the past; you blew it.  

You are not worthy of God’s grace; you must punish yourself.  

You must prove to God how sorry you are.  

And to show that you are humble, truly humble, you must hang on to regret and guilt.”   

“If you want to be responsible, take ownership of what you did wrong and hold it close; it was your fault.”  

How many of you struggle with regret and guilt?  

Because of what Jesus did for us, we should be waking up with the thoughts, “I live in the power of God’s grace.  I am free from every mistake in my past.  I know I blew it in the past, but with God, everything is forgiven, everything is behind me, and I am new.  Because of God, I have a bright future.  I am so grateful for God, the power of His grace, and I can rest in that.  I see myself as fully redeemed and loved by God.   Regardless of my past and my past mistakes, today I am living God’s plan ‘A’ for me.”  

Do you see that battle?  What is happening?  Remember, it’s spiritual.  God spiritually redeemed you, and your enemy is lying to you so he can steal everything Jesus died to give to you.  Do you have thoughts that sound like this, “Look at my life, I blew it.  I should have [fill in the blank].  If only I would have [fill in the blank].  I messed up, now I’m living out God’s plan ‘B’ for me”?  That’s regret.  That’s guilt.

Why is regret and guilt so dangerous?  These thoughts are hitting the start button in your brain.  Your brain begins replaying your past, your failures, your mistakes, your sins, all of it.  You loop in it.  You can’t get away from it.  You conclude, “Look at what I have done, I am stuck, and it’s all because of me.”  Remember what Sam said last week about our thoughts?  Studies have shown that we can have up to 60,000 thoughts in a day, with up to 40,000 of them negative, and over half of those negative thoughts we repeat daily.   

Do you see what is happening?  In the spiritual realm, something huge just happened.  Everything Jesus died to give you was stolen.  Your freedom.  Your identity.  Your courage, passion, and your strength.  Your enemy just tricked you into surrendering the power of God’s grace.  You were just taken out.  You're not standing with courage and advancing God’s kingdom.   Now, you limp along with feelings that somehow you aren’t good enough, and you don’t measure up.  If you believe that, you are struggling to experience God’s grace.  If regret and guilt have stolen God’s grace from you, it should make you angry.  If you have friends and family who live with regret and guilt, you see how it has taken them out, don’t you?

It is true that many Christians wrestle with regret and guilt.  It’s okay, it can be normal.  They gave their lives to Jesus.  They love God.  They experience worship sets and sing about God’s grace, power, and freedom, but when they leave church, their brains replay their past.  They hear sermons on freedom, but when they leave, their brains replay the past.  They read books about God’s joy and peace, but later their brains replay their past.   They get married, have kids, and every day, month, and year as they grow older, their brains replay their past.  What is happening?  Spiritual warfare.  And even though they know about the power of God’s grace, their thoughts are stealing everything Jesus died to give them.  Doesn’t this make you angry?  It should.

Those thoughts of regret and guilt will steal our physical energy, leaving us feeling defeated, stuck, and tired.  Those thoughts steal our hope for a bright future, leaving us feeling hopeless.  Those thoughts steal our ability to enjoy every moment of today.  We should be living lives based on freedom, joy, and passion.  But how can we?  We live with regret and guilt.  Can you connect with this?

Let’s talk about regret and guilt, and talk about how we end those thoughts.

Let’s go to scripture.

2 Corinthians 7:10 For the kind of sorrow God wants us to experience leads us away from sin and results in salvation. There’s no regret for that kind of sorrow. But worldly sorrow, which lacks repentance, results in spiritual death. NLT

The first thing I want to say about guilt is that there is good guilt.  Good guilt is when we realize we have sinned, and those feelings of guilt lead us away from sin to God.  That’s good.   Scripture says that when that happens, it leads us to salvation.   

The guilt we are talking about today would be bad guilt, or false guilt.  False guilt is when I am completely forgiven, redeemed, and set free, but I hold onto guilty feelings.  We think, “God may have forgiven me, but I can’t forgive myself.”  So, we continue to carry the load of regret and guilt for our bad decisions or anything in our past.

If you struggle with regret and guilt, I want you to see what is happening.  You are saying, “What Jesus did on the cross for my freedom isn’t enough; I have to help Jesus by punishing myself.”  Listen, if you could make yourself right with God by punishing yourself, then there was no reason for Jesus to die.  False guilt insults Jesus and what Jesus did on the cross.  

Galatians 2:21 If keeping the law could make us right with God, then there was no need for Christ to die. NLT

If we could make ourselves right with God by punishing ourselves, then Jesus never had to die.  When you hold onto regret and guilt, you are saying, “God’s grace doesn’t apply to me.”

Do you see the damage that false guilt does in our lives?  And I want to point out, I’m talking to people who have accepted Jesus as their savior.   They moved from the country of sin to a country of grace.  God has poured His righteousness into them.  God has made them holy, pure, and blameless.  And somehow, by punishing themselves, they think they are making things better when in reality, the enemy is tricking them and stealing everything Jesus died to give them.  When you see it, it should make you so very angry.  

How do we know we might be holding onto regret and guilt?  Here are a couple of possible traits.

First trait: Deer in headlights.  

When asked to get close to God, they are like deer in headlights, frozen.  Why?  To get close to God means they would have to let go of regret and guilt, and they can’t.   They can beat themselves up so badly about their past that they can’t enjoy the power of God’s grace.  They believe they are stuck and must live in regret and guilt.  This especially applies to people who have been Christians for many years.  They want to be responsible and mature, and so they think they must hold onto guilt, and that’s not true.

Let me ask you, do you struggle to build a relationship with Jesus?  When others talk about doing their devotions, do you get quiet because the truth is you have been staying away from Jesus for years?  You know you do the least possible.  You may be holding onto regret and guilt.  Please hear me, if you are, your enemy has tricked you and stolen what Jesus died to give to you.  I want you to know that the power of God’s grace applies to you.  You don’t have to punish yourself anymore.  God’s grace includes redeeming everything from your past.   

Second trait: You want to stay in the boat.  

Eleven disciples stayed in the boat, where it was safe.  Only one jumped out and walked on water.  In life, it’s hard to have courage, passion, and strength.   Why?  Those things come from the power of God’s grace.  A guilty person doesn’t experience freedom, so they want to play it safe.  They will settle for a life of pleasing people or checking out.  A guilty person doesn’t like themselves, so they don’t want to be in relationships with others, and they will hide from others.  They believe that if others really knew who they were, they wouldn’t like them.  So real friendships are a struggle for them.  They can come across as distant, distracted, or hard to connect with.  

Let me ask you, do you find it safer to be a people pleaser or check out of relationships?  You may be holding onto regret and guilt.  One of the most beautiful moments in your life is when you realize that God already knows everything about you and already accepts you as you are, right now.  Have you ever had that moment?  It’s life-changing.  Another beautiful moment in your life is when you break free from being a people pleaser or checking out.  It’s when you stop hating yourself and are able to relax and enjoy people.  

If you want to get rid of regret and guilt, you will need to do these three things repeatedly.  This stuff doesn’t always go away quickly.   You are in a war, and in a war, there are many battles.  

First, remember you are in a spiritual war.   

The Christian life is not a playground; it’s a battlefield for your mind.  As you go to work, pay your bills, and get your kids to the right sports fields, you must remember that you have an enemy who is evil and doesn’t play fair.  His whole goal is to steal, kill, and destroy what Jesus died to give you.  He will always give you lies to believe.  

And please recognize that everyone you love is in the same battle, too.  You must see this.  Treat everyone like they are in the same battle you are in.  You struggle to see your value, yeah, they do too.  You struggle to remember where you are and who you are, yeah, they do too.  You struggle with regret and guilt, yeah, they do too.  So, love them, protect them, build them up.  Remind them who they are.

Second, remember your thoughts determine everything in your life. 

How we view ourselves.  How we view others.  How we view life.  How we view God.  What you think about on repeat will determine your life.  In general, you will have 40,000 negative thoughts today, and over half of those negative thoughts you will repeat daily.  So, you must pay attention to your thoughts.  Take them captive.  Do not agree with anything that is not true.   

Remember the verse Sam gave us?

2 Corinthians 10:5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. NIV

We take captive every thought, and we demolish it if it isn’t true.

And please recognize that everyone you love is in the same battle, too.  You must see this.  Treat everyone like they have 40,000 negative thoughts about themselves and 20,000 negative thoughts on repeat daily.  Do you feel like you aren’t worthy? Yeah, they do too.  You struggle with low self-esteem, yeah, they do too.  You struggle with negative thoughts, yeah, they do too.  So, love them, protect them, build them up.  Remind them who they are.

Third, remember where you are [you are in new grace country] and who you are [you have been filled with the righteousness of God]. 

Every day, remind yourself where you are and who you are.  If you don’t, you will lose this spiritual battle.  Stay very close to Jesus in a personal relationship with Him through reading your Bible and praying.   

Three things every day.   You are in a spiritual battle.   Your thoughts will determine everything in your life.  Remember where you are and who you are.

Let’s close with the power of scripture and questions.

1 John 1:9-10 If we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from every wrong. NLT

The Greek word for "sins" is ἁμαρτίας (transliterated: hamartias), which means to miss the mark, a failure, or a fault.  

If you look back in your life and remember that you have sinned, if you have missed the mark, if you have failed, if you have blown it, scripture says, confess it to God and God will forgive you and cleanse you.   In that moment, you can finally dump regret and guilt.  Those thoughts should never be allowed to be on repeat in your mind.

Questions.

Do you believe you are in a spiritual battle?  Do you believe those you love are in a spiritual battle?  Do you remind yourself where you are and who you are every day?  What negative thoughts have been playing on repeat in your mind?  Do you struggle with regret and guilt in your life?  Is it normal for you to think, “Look at my life, I blew it.  I should have [fill in the blank].  If only I would have [fill in the blank].  I messed up, now I’m living out God’s plan ‘B’ for me.”?  Please hear me, that’s regret.  That’s guilt.  Do you struggle to live with courage, passion, and strength?  Do you believe, after experiencing God’s grace, you are living out God’s plan ‘A’ for your life or God’s plan ‘B’?

20 question assessment to get a handle on your guilt self-talk. 1 never 10 often

I recall things I said to my mom or dad I wish I could take back.

I made a mistake when I chose my career path.

I recall sexual activity I wish I'd never done.

I recall a situation where I wish I had done more to help a friend.

I have unfinished business with a loved one who has now passed away.

I regret missing irreplaceable moments [example: with a child].

I’ve missed opportunities I'll never get back.

I should have taken my education more seriously.

I think about poor financial decisions I have made.

I wish I’d gotten help for a problem I have or had.

The choices I’ve made in my love life trouble me.

I regret not having a child [or another child].

Relatively inconsequential regrets [such as leaving too small a tip for a pizza delivery] haunt me.

I think about how my life would be better if I had taken an opportunity I passed up.

I wish I had worked harder on a character quality I lack [example: patience].

I wasted years on my life with destructive behavior [such as drug or alcohol abuse].

I have focused too much on my career and not enough on my relationships.

I think of an opportunity I didn’t take because it seemed too risky but now I wish I had.

The hurtful words I said to someone still haunt me.

I regret never learning to do a certain activity [example: play the piano].