Do you see the logo for the Proverbs series? There are two people walking through life. One has a monster boulder on their back. The other is just walking along easily pushing the boulder. You see the obvious difference – right? The one is exhausted and worn down. The other is peaceful and trouble-free. That’s the perfect image for Proverbs. Why?
Because the book of Proverbs explains the facts of life. It explains how the world works. There are two ways you can live. One way of living is when you listen to God, to reality, and to older wiser people. When you walk with humility, over time, your life will be more and more peaceful and trouble-free. If you live this way, we call that wisdom. It’s the image of the person pushing the rock with ease.
The other way of living is thinking, ‘I know better than everyone else, so I will ignore God, reality, and older wiser people.’ When you live this way, you walk with pride and over time your life will become harder and harder and harder. Life will become exhausting and it will wear you out. We call this way of living, being a fool. It’s the image of the person huffing the gigantic boulder on their back.
When you read through Proverbs, it forces us to answer this one question: How will I live out life?
Now there is something I want you to see as we walk through Proverbs. What is the big difference between being wise and being a fool? What is the difference between carrying the rock and pushing the rock? Sam explained it last week. One word: pride. Pride is the thing inside us that pushes against wisdom. Pride pushes against God, reality, and older wiser people. Pride says, ‘I know better than God so I will live my way.’ The Bible calls that person a fool. In some translations, they are called an idiot or a simpleton.
Remember what Sam shared last week right out of Proverbs?
A fool thinks he needs no advice, but a wise man listens to others. TLB Proverbs 12:15
First pride, then the crash – the bigger the ego, the harder the fall. MSG Proverbs 16:18
Sam did such a great job setting the foundation for the Proverbs series last week. The one point that really jumped out to me was when Sam helped us understand why the author of Proverbs was so wise. He was wise because when God offered Solomon anything he wanted, Solomon asked for wisdom. Who lives like that? When the genie is out of the lamp and you are offered anything you want, who ignores health, wealth, and comfort for wisdom? A humble person does. Solomon was humble and his humility was the doorway to God blessing him with wisdom and it’s the same doorway for us to find wisdom.
Sam walked us through the first step we must take to live a wise life.
Start with God – the first step in learning is bowing down to God; only fools thumb their noses at such wisdom and learning. MSG Proverbs 1:7
Same verse, different translation.
Fear [that means: respect, reverence, or awe] of the Lord is the foundation of true knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline. NLT Proverbs 1:7
Step one to finding wisdom is surrendering our lives to God.
At some point in your life, you will need to decide who or what will be the foundation of your life. Who or what is the thing you will put your trust into to determine how you will live? There are three options.
Option 1: Will it be people around you – your culture? Will the thoughts and feelings of people around you determine how you will live? You will run into this when you are very young because this is the time period you are most insecure. And in that insecurity, it’s natural that you will want others to like you. Unfortunately, some people grow older but remain people pleasers and what other people think, what their culture thinks, determines how they live.
This is how Jesus lived.
I’m not interested in crowd approval. And do you know why? Because I know you and your crowds. I know that love, especially God’s love, is not on your working agenda… How do you expect to get anywhere with God when you spend all your time jockeying for position with each other, ranking your rivals and ignoring God? – Jesus MSG John 5:42-44
Jesus never lived for the approval of others – nor should you.
Who or what is the thing you will put your trust into to determine how you will live? Option 2: Will it be you? Will your thoughts and feelings determine how you will live? As we grow older, we have a mix of sin, insecurities, wounds, and fears. We tend to make decisions that would make us feel comfortable and make life easier. We tend to want to do the least possible. We tend to create excuses as to why life is so hard for us. And if we aren’t careful, we begin to make decisions that go against what scripture says.
The problem with looking to ourselves to direct our lives, we have no power to deal with spiritual things. King David realized, if I rely on myself, there are things I have no power to deal with. I need God.
4 My bones are brittle as dry sticks because of my sin. I’m swamped by my bad behavior, collapsed under an avalanche of guilt. 5-8 The cuts in my flesh stink and grow maggots because I’ve lived so badly. And now I’m flat on my face feeling sorry for myself morning to night. All my insides are on fire, my body is a wreck. I’m on my last legs; I’ve had it – my life is a vomit of groans. NLT Psalms 38:4-8
Putting your faith in yourself is pretty naïve because there are things you can’t do. Like making sin or guilt go away.
Who or what is the thing you will put your trust into to determine how you will live? Option 3: Will it be God? Regardless of what others say, regardless of your feelings, will you put your trust in God to determine how you will live?
God said this to Isaiah.
“My thoughts,” says the Lord, “are not like yours, and my ways are different from yours. As high as the heavens are above the earth, so high are my ways and thoughts above yours.” GNT Isaiah 55:8-9
At some point in your life, you will need to decide who or what will be the foundation of your life. Who or what is the thing you will put your trust into to determine how you will live? Your culture, you, or God. When you place your trust and faith in God and surrender your life to God, Proverbs explains what happens.
The way of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, which shines ever brighter until the full light of day. But the way of the wicked is like total darkness. They have no idea what they are stumbling over. NLT Proverbs 4:18-19
Do you see it? When I make the decision that God is the foundation of my life and I follow what He says, my life is blessed, it becomes more enjoyable. When I make the decision that my culture or my feelings are the foundation of my life, life gets harder and I will stumble through life.
I remember when one of my daughters had her driver’s permit. She started noticing cars. She shared with me the kind of car she wanted. They were new. They were shiny. They were beautiful. They were very expensive. To her disappointment, I shared with her that she would be inheriting the used minivan with over 200,000 miles on it. Why? It was free. It didn’t bring her joy when I explained that I wanted her to work, save money, and then buy a good used car. That way she could start life after High School debt free. Funny story. Her nickname on her sports team was, ‘Mom’ because she drove a minivan.
What does our culture tell you about cars? Go into unnecessary debt and get a new car to increase your status. What does our natural desire tell us to do? Get the new car, it will be more comfortable, and you will look so good. What does wisdom tell us? Stay out of debt.
We call that wisdom. When you follow wisdom, you do the best you can to stay debt free so that over your life, your financial security can grow. You can ignore that, and that would make you a fool. What is the difference between trying to stay debt free and going into unnecessary debt to get a brand-new shiny car? Pride. If you get into debt, over time, you can end up stumbling through life. And if you don’t believe me, ask anyone over the age of 45, did going into unnecessary debt lead to more problems or less problems?
I remember when one of my daughters wanted to know, why do guys want to have sex? I said because guys view sex differently than girls. Guys view sex as conquering something to make them feel like they are a man. Girls view sex as being emotionally close to someone to make them feel loved. That’s why God said, the only context for sex is marriage between a man and a woman.
I told her, guys who want to have sex outside of marriage are very insecure and are trying to feel like a man but have no idea how to be a man. The problem is girls oftentimes fall for that. They think I want to feel emotionally close to someone and feel loved so I will give him sex. When the two have sex, it goes really bad. He walks away feeling empty because he has a false sense of being a man, so he moves on to conquer someone else. She walks away devastated because he never gave her the emotional closeness, she needed to feel loved. That’s why sex was created for marriage.
What does our culture tell you about sex? Anytime, anywhere, with anyone, there are no boundaries and if you say anything different, you are full of hate. What does our natural desire tell us to do? It would be fun, go for it. If you are a guy, you will feel like a man. If you are a girl, you will feel loved. What does wisdom tell us? Keep sex inside of marriage.
We call that wisdom. When you follow wisdom, you keep sex in marriage. You can ignore that, and that would make you a fool. We live in a culture desperately trying to take sex outside of marriage for anyone at any time and for any reason. And that only leads to devastating emotional, physical, and spiritual issues. If it becomes normal to have sex outside of marriage, you can end up stumbling through life. What is the difference between keeping sex in marriage or not? Pride. I want what I want today. And if you don’t believe me, ask anyone who had sex outside of marriage, did having sex lead to more problems or less problems?
With the remaining time I have, I want to talk about a very common problem in the Church. One of the most dangerous places to grow up is the church. Real quickly, I am obviously pro-Church. We just did an entire series on Church because Church matters. Stick with me here. Why is Church a dangerous place to grow up? Because when you grow up in church, you hear wise principles but that doesn’t mean you have surrendered your life to God. You can learn how to say the right words, you can go on the right mission tips, you can attend the best discipleships, and you can appear to be soft-hearted, while at the same time not surrendering your life to God. You can learn how to live out wise principles, while at the same time not surrendering your life to God.
This is why Jesus was so confrontational with the Pharisees. I want to read for you what Jesus said to their faces.
You’re hopeless, you religion scholars and Pharisees! Frauds! You buff the surface of your cups and bowls so they sparkle in the sun, while the insides are maggoty with your greed and gluttony. Stupid Pharisee! Scour the insides, and then the gleaming surface will mean something. MSG Matthew 23:25
Jesus is confronting pride. This way of living appears good on the outside because we live out wise principles but is still ugly on the inside because the heart isn’t changed. Jesus called them hopeless.
Growing up in church can be dangerous because we tend to work on all the areas people notice. Jesus called that the outside of the cup. But all along we can struggle to be wise in the areas people don’t notice – the stuff we hide in our hearts. And what is even worse is when we live out wise principles and appear wise and then become comfortable becoming judgmental or critical of others.
The problem with growing up in church is, we can learn how to be hypocrites. That means I look good on the outside, but I don’t surrender my life to God to deal with the ugly stuff on the inside.
This is what I want you to see. There is a difference between living out a wise principle like being debt-free or keeping sex in marriage and surrendering your life to God and following after God. Anyone can follow wise principles and their lives will be better. But Godly wisdom is different. Godly wisdom is humility. It’s deciding, God is the foundation of my life, not what culture thinks, not how I feel, but what God said. It’s being in awe of God and what He has done for us so much so, I surrender my life to God. I will do what God asked me to do because I believe God is right. I will do what God asked me to do even when I want to do something else. I will do what God asked me to do even when it’s hard. I want what God wants more than what I want because God is the foundation of my life.
Remember Proverbs 4:18-19?
The way of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, which shines ever brighter until the full light of day. But the way of the wicked is like total darkness. They have no idea what they are stumbling over. NLT Proverbs 4:18-19
That sounds a lot like what is written in the New Testament.
God gives strength to the humble but sets himself against the proud and haughty. TLB James 4:6
Godly wisdom is when I humble myself and follow after God. I fear, I am in awe of, I respect God so I surrender and deal with my heart. I deal with all the junk on the inside of my heart as I follow Him. And when I am humble, God gives me strength. He blesses me. I didn’t say God makes me feel good every day. I didn’t say life will be easy every day. I didn’t say life will look the way I want it to look. I didn’t say everything will be perfect. I said God blesses the life that is humble and goes after Him. God gives strength to you to walk through life. And any success I have, I am grateful for what God has given me, I’m not prideful for what I have accomplished.
Let’s close with a few questions.
What is the foundation of your life? Is it culture? In other words, do you care more about what people think or what God thinks? Who do you respect or fear more, people or God?
What is the foundation of your life? Is it your feelings? In other words, do you make decisions based on how you feel even when your decisions go against the Bible? If you were honest, do you find that you tend to be immature and selfish and make excuses as to why you can never change?
What is the foundation of your life? Is it God? Do you find it normal that you are dealing with your true heart condition? Do you find it normal that you do what God asked regardless of your culture or your feelings?
In what areas of your life are you wise? What areas of your life are you not wise?
When your parents ask you questions, does it make you mad? Why do you think that is?
If you grew up in Church, did you learn how to look good on the outside and not surrender your heart to God? Do you feel like you try to hide who you really are from others? Do you feel comfortable being transparent and sharing your personal challenges with close friends?
Would you say that you are walking humbly with God, surrendering your heart to God?